Rama Moondra

The movie may have attracted mixed response at theatres but overall delivers a great message. I believe that anything or everything has a message but it depends on us, when and how we take it.

I liked the movie for two basic reasons. One that I like both leads i.e. Deepika and Neil but second reason is more obvious and pertinent. The way love has been projected in the movie is beautiful.

Two scenes that caught my attention had a silent but painful demonstration of love and guilt of a male counterpart. Deepika becomes blind because of Neil’s mistake. She tries to walk without support, gets rejected by her dance partner and from the world too. Trying to learn to walk without any support and blind, she keeps falling and hurting herself. Neil silently stands behind her and bitten by guilt, he tries to catch but resists every time. His guilt and helplessness is projected very well.

Second time, a seasoned skate dancer, Deepika, hurt by reality that Neil was the reason, decides to perform alone on stage which was supposed to be a duet. It was her biggest exam in a way. She starts, moves flawlessly but since solo is not counted, just when she was about to be rejected, Neil enters. Swiftly, he glides next to her. Not holding her even if it was meant to be, not touching her, not consoling her, not even giving a hint of his presence, he shadows her.

She realizes his presence and the dance of love is complete then. They win as love always does.

Sometimes, even when we think, love has left us wounded and alone, all it needs is a little re-assurance of the other person’s shadow. It makes a difference to know that you make a difference in some one’s world.

Today’s blog is for struggle and victories, to hope and belief and to life once again.

Let life happen to you .Just feel it.

 I listen to my heart more than my head.True! I mean it. Long ago, I realized, I am more emotional and less logical. (Though I know, if my boss reads it, he would disagree) Being emotional gave me a lot of anger and resentment too but emotions make the world a better place to live. They penetrate me through various means. A drop of tear on someone else’s cheeks, A cute child meeting first time in a shop and making friends with me, A blind girl marrying another physically challenged person, A rain-filled weekend and missing my loved ones, the last friend in the town migrating leaving a feeling of dullness, the list is endless.

With life showering rain and sunshine with shades of grey and gold interwoven, I have grown up as a mature woman outside. In this materialistic world out liars, white liars and cheaters are in abundance, insensitive people and advantage taking in name of charity and breaking my trust is a routine, I still have managed to keep a portion of my heart intact, not immune though I wished it to be so.

I have given money to people knowing it would never come back, I help people who cheat and I have been good to many who in turn have embarrassed me. But I still continue to be same. “Why” -Because, I do not want a single genuine person getting crucified because other nine betrayed. I think it is sin to do so.

 And life has ways to pay back. I have been blessed by great assignments, loving family and friends in every corner of world but what makes it worth listening from heart is, I have received help from unbelievable sources just when I needed,. Every time when a dark corner lights up, I know a prayer is answered. Someone somewhere has prayed for a loved one.

 And god listens from heart to heart just as love does.

It was unusual of Bernie, my friend from London days to call up at middle of night. “A muffed voice was on the other side.” Our Nick is no more. We lost him in air jump”…I just could not figure out what it meant. I had lost my precious, now ex, boss a day before to destiny and  just twenty four hours.

“You are drunk. It can’t be our Nick.” But by that time my heart had lost its beat and faith .Nick is no more. Sitting quiet, my memories did not leave my heart alone. Nick named me “Marble Princess.”  My first scuba dive had left a major cut on my feet and bleeding through it, I continued my swim. Some who does not cry was marble according to him.

 Nick was my adventure sports coach and became a great pal after that. I would just keep pulling his legs for having new girlfriend every time. “A man’s heart is too big for one woman alone.” He would laugh out. My trips to Europe were incomplete without meeting him. We travelled miles at times to be at a common place just for a few hours, share our sides of world and wine.

Little did I know when I met him recently, I would never see him again. Life gives us rudest shocks. Just when you feel, you have all your priceless possessions of friends and loved ones in place, they go away. Without giving a chance at times to express, to celebrate, to regret, to clarify. All that is left, unsaid stories and expressions with a sense of void which can’t be filled. Remorse untold.

 Human beings are irreplaceable and so are some relations. They are just too special. How I wish, I could recreate some part of my life and ask some people to stay back at any cost.

Right now, when I am physically down with high fever and painful foot, Nick’s first coaching comes to hold my hand, “The intensity of pain is decided by your reaction to it. Make friends with pain. That’s only truth we live with.”

Nick, I will live with your loss and my other friends too. I have made friends with it.

On my knees, in front of god almighty, with tears in my prayers I bid goodbye to departed ones. After a long time, these words are dedicated to my ex boss and Nick. Two people, whose memories are now part of my internal and spiritual wealth,

May peace prevails.

I had a funny experience recently. A close friend of mine was surprised to see some comments on his blog from US. He checked back to figure out it was a wrong IP address.Incidentally, he felt it was mischief of his subordinate, who volunteered to market his blog. (No wonder, this word is missing in corporate vocab). If you do a good job and that too with good intentions, you had it.

 Very upset and angry, he expressed his concern. Poor subordinate was speechless once he understood how the boss perceived him. I am sure many bosses at corporate level do this mistake. They just hit it hard without understanding that it may bring unwanted reaction. The junior is now working hard to prove himself innocent. (My heart bleeds for emotional volunteers)

It is fine to put anyone under scanner of doubt but the senior authority has to learn to look at motto. What the junior has to gain except trying to make an impression for next year’s appraisal. I personally believe human race has lost how to believe good intentions and retain  genuine people. As it is a rare breed .

To me, the boss was right to check back with junior.  If you value your intuitions, you must. To me, the junior too has a right to feel bad.It hurts being misunderstood.

Though I think, being questioned does not mean permanent distrust. He may clarify though backed up with data. If the boss values last performances, he will not like to loose a good performer.

Once , head of a big corporate drank limewater out of finger bowl because Austrian guest (had not seen it before) drank it and he followed suit. It is important sometime to value the person than rubbing raw corrections.

To me, intent is always more important than content. Wish all distrusting bosses a little piece of peace with their ownself.

I could write about strategic relationship management much better. After all, a client vendor kind of relationship never has much complication. But whats the fun writing about  something  you can buy a book and read. So, I would rather write about basics of any relation. I think its mutual respect that determines quality of life.

 I am glad; life does not come with a service manual. Relationships do not have warranty cards. I recently have been part of friend’s life who is reeling under pain of leaving home after his father asked him to. It is difficult for father to give away the business to new generation son who is well informed in client servicing and a tech junkie. Therefore, ideally I should be sad about my friend is suffering. Contrary to that, I am feeling good. He will grow as independent human being now.  The identity crisis he is facing today will settle down in a while. The birth of Phoenix proves that its important to face fire to have a new life.

 Life teaches only hard ways. I have been a student of that way always and have learnt to be what I am today. My comfort with my own self has come from being alone and managing life my ways. I learnt that success is relative term. I learnt that no matter how discomforting it is, I would always have people who can read me as a book despite hardly knowing me. I learnt that all relations have their share of pain and pleasure. That despite I am not a caring person, I have people who care for me immensely. That my brother can get my mindset from a simple “hello” on phone and it surprises as much as it did ten years ago.

 Though not everything what happens may be comforting that time but I believe, ultimately we get what we deserve and not what we desire.The good part is life moves on and that is what makes it worth living. So what if sometime the wine glass has tear drops in it.

This write up is in a way response to three people. Anil and Abhishek, for their comments and questions . Vivek , a complete stranger for his call and  request to articulate his story. Vivek has a single  female boss. Happy with each other professionally, Vivek almost started looking at her as mentor and elder sister feeling. Here, I understand Vivek’s position. He lost his mother at 15 years age. I am sure anyone who slightly gave a sheltered feel,made close connect with his heart. This resulted in sharing personal details, dinners and movies. For Vivek, it did not mean so but for his boss the equation started changing. She went an extra mile to make life easy for Vivek at work.

One night on his way to drop her home after a long day at work, she invited him. Vivek  shocked and hurt, explained her the way  he thought about her.

Vivek was transferred  to other office in same city. His product portfolio has changed and a new struggle has begun.

He asked me,”What did I do, I did everything to make her happy at work . Is not she a Sadist? Asking for attention?What went wrong? “.To me, nothing actually. Everyone needs attention in life. Sharing stories of personal  pain with someone brings a feeling of intimacy.Once the bond is established, failing on it is embarrassing.

Masochism or Sadism both gets attention for a short term. Then it bounces back following third law.”Every action has an equal and opposite reaction”. Anil is right when he says, Men pause better at times . Their capacity of dumping past is higher if the new beginning is their choice.

Vivek, what if the situation was other way round? Would you be hurt as much?  I agree with Abhishek, Not only women live for others and that again can not be generalized.