Rama Moondra

I love children. To me, they are best negotiators, have great memory and can pursue till death (of course, yours).   I am hosting my nieces these days.

My profession of wine trainer does compel me to store many variety of glassware.My six year old niece loved the idea of so many beautiful options for her to have hot milk. After breaking a crystal stemware, she figured out, this was not meant for hot milk.  After a while, she decided to  have strawberry shake in martini glass. (Hope, Martin Zindalfel is not reading it.)

So the similar glass was offered to elder one who is nine years old.” Oh, I do not want it in this glass.” She gave me bewildered look”. How can you serve it in this glass? It’s expensive and not for milk shakes.” It was my turn to be amused. “So, what do I serve in it,” I asked and waited response with breath stuck in my lungs. “Hmmm some alcohol” She smiled. I cannot blame her. Studying in Ivy League school and parents partying every Saturday, she has grown with it. She gave me another shock when she happily informed me that any unbranded softy is bad.

I fondly remembered my childhood. It was fun to get a new dress and with just one set of crockery at home, we were not allowed to touch any glassware. It made so much sense for my buddy Joyen who waited every afternoon outside my school to get me a roadside lolly. I never felt sick despite that.

Our new generation Z is growing very different and materialistic. Though change is life’s only constant feature, sometimes it is important to look back and try finding that innocence which is lost in Reality shows and child anchors.So, just when I am writing this trying to stop my laughter on the news that, a school in Hyderabad has started sand pits in ac hall and warm water rain. After all, a child needs closeness to Nature, Principal said.

 Being familiar with nature is important. Its our legacy they will inherit.  I am sure we owe  this to our gen Z .

I had a funny experience recently. A close friend of mine was surprised to see some comments on his blog from US. He checked back to figure out it was a wrong IP address.Incidentally, he felt it was mischief of his subordinate, who volunteered to market his blog. (No wonder, this word is missing in corporate vocab). If you do a good job and that too with good intentions, you had it.

 Very upset and angry, he expressed his concern. Poor subordinate was speechless once he understood how the boss perceived him. I am sure many bosses at corporate level do this mistake. They just hit it hard without understanding that it may bring unwanted reaction. The junior is now working hard to prove himself innocent. (My heart bleeds for emotional volunteers)

It is fine to put anyone under scanner of doubt but the senior authority has to learn to look at motto. What the junior has to gain except trying to make an impression for next year’s appraisal. I personally believe human race has lost how to believe good intentions and retain  genuine people. As it is a rare breed .

To me, the boss was right to check back with junior.  If you value your intuitions, you must. To me, the junior too has a right to feel bad.It hurts being misunderstood.

Though I think, being questioned does not mean permanent distrust. He may clarify though backed up with data. If the boss values last performances, he will not like to loose a good performer.

Once , head of a big corporate drank limewater out of finger bowl because Austrian guest (had not seen it before) drank it and he followed suit. It is important sometime to value the person than rubbing raw corrections.

To me, intent is always more important than content. Wish all distrusting bosses a little piece of peace with their ownself.

 I may feel like writing oodles on this subject but that will be too textual. Therefore, I would rather concentrate on applicability in everyday corporate function. 

Dealing with uncertainty, moving from ignorance to knowledge, is the focus of cognitive process. My major challenge as a capacity builder is that people do not want to grow and recognize their cognitive reasoning.

 Let us look at a simple example; a close friend of mine is going through a painful patch. He tried leaving his home thrice, been upset with his father’s behavior terribly and went back every time. Very angry with self and others, he reeled under loosing everything despite his soul belonged there. He felt like a little kid on a busy street without parents and ran back. He still is unhappy.  Now unknowingly, with every little possibility that could take him back, he availed it.

Unable to reason, “No matter how hard you try to please, some people would never want you the way you want”. Now he is dealing with uncertainty but refuse to move on from ignorance to knowledge.

 Why accepting ignorance is difficult?  Most of us do not think and the routine, mundane jobs do not allow us to do so. Surprisingly we do not realize it either. Hiding behind a façade,” I did not understand it then” One of the challenges of cognitive reasoning is ability to accept whatever happens around us, just the way it is. It soothes later though may irritate to begin with.

However, exceptions are around.  My boss’s cognitive reasoning is moving on from old patterns. He believes Alcohol should be sold in tetra packs. ” Nasha sharab me nahi hai toh bhi kya, No risk taking business”

 Corporate Definition: Reasoning is ability to get a reason for everything.

 It pains to see people go. Goodbyes hurt most when you do not get to say them. However, I think, what hurts most is to trust and be cheated.

Why would people cheat? When someone asked me this recently with choked voice and weepy eyes, I did not reply then. Actually cheating is pure definition of someone not behaving the way one should have. Days in and days out, it happens to most of us.

Life plays a game of expectations to keep human race going. If there were no expectations, there could not have been possibilities either. Some break ups are permanent damage. Therefore, someone moving on from a serious relationship may not signify a new beginning always. Someone having tear soaked, painful break up from close relationship may not amend the cracks in crystal vase ever.

“What would have happened if I were not vulnerable? Have I been emotional fool?” I heard it many times in silence recently. How could one prevent oneself from loving someone? How could you not be emotional to your own heart and people who live in that cozy corner?

We all are vulnerable to love and then to let go. Nevertheless, it is worth loving and let go hundred times then  to close your heart and not let it brighten from power of giving. It pains, it hurts and it proves that you are alive. May not be for a new beginning but for own strength of being able to give and breathe afresh.

For all those who have loved and lost, with a silent prayer that you must find your own strength. It is within you just the way once love was.

 What surprises me about Bollywood is the insensitivity towards all sensitive issues. I agree it is industry of selling dreams. Over a period, it has started selling pains. No qualms, if the subject is handled well and  logically. I loved “Taare Jameen par” and “Black”.

 I like Farhan and Deepika both so had to see this one. Though Farry dear has acted very well, the schizophrenic part is not justified at all.

 As a part of my profession, it will not be out of context to mention that schizophrenics actually have three layers experiential symptoms.

 Positive (racing thoughts and hallucinations) Negative (Poor social ability and lack of emotions) and Cognitive (difficult to concentrate for long time and poor memory).

  It is very difficult for a person to suffer multiple mental disorders and have a fulfilled life along with career. No matter what, since it is a bollywood movie and we can never let our hero-worship fail, he has his share of My fair lady and beats everyone hands down in organizational games.

 Good time pass stuff if you do not get into technical part of movie and makes a good clip shot for “me the poor victim” types to be inspired. Happy that women are getting over their typical “Sati- Savitri” image.

 P.S. Men must learn how to take a girl out for a coffee after watching this. Dedicated to all those Men who still are learning art of persuasion and to  bold and honest to themselves women as Deepika potryed herself.

Our past teaches us a lot. We all grow up , grow with and grow apart with relationships. I believe, very few things change as quick as relations change their faces. I have seen some people fading out of my life and have been witness to some other people’s life too.

A loved one, a known friend, a fabulous colleague; they all move on and though it hurts occasionally, the process makes space for someone else to move in. I think it is impossible to maintain every person as we embark on journey of life. I personally lost some and gained some too. Nevertheless, what charms me is the chemistry, which clicks with people who are alike, and one keeps getting them on the way. (Thankfully).

 It makes so much sense to let go and un clutter the junk of people who do not value you the same way you would. In the flash of smile, once in a while, a  treasure  sparkles on the face of a stranger. I welcome it every time. The snow melts and takes old footprints with it. New snow gets fresh footprints and new companions to walk on.

After all, life is about meeting, creating memories and moving on. If there were no memories, how poor human race would be.